Clinto
Clinto's story It was a cold and stormy night, Clinto's mother was crying, his parents were having sex. "No, stop! I think I can feel a baby coming out", said his mother. His father continued, disregarding her statement. He pushed and pushed his penis inside of her as she screamed in pain. She felt herself imploding as he finished off with an orgasm. As he pulled out, she saw an arm. And a toe. And a dead body. It was Clinto. Her mother was in tears as Clinto was born, but dead. She poured bleach on his body to preserve his remains. 100 years later, on the planet Clintopia, a weird man shows up. It's Clinto! He goes up to a child and says, "what day is it?" and the child responds "it's christmas mr scrooge". Clinto, in anger of the mistake the child has made, blows his brains out with a glock and goes on his way. He picks up a gun from the stoor and is given a new identidy, and the leader of Clintopia puts him in a time machine and says "Go! Mr. Klebold! Follow your dreams". He is sent to 1999 with his buddy Eric. They are both known as members of Columbine, he walks into the school. And goes back to Clintopia to tell his people what he has done. "I did it", he said, "I have done my deed, now can you please tack this strap on out of me?". His whole planet laughs. Clinto, still holding his weapon. Raises his weapon and murders everyone on planet Clintopia. He walks to a spaceshuttle, and goes to the year 1889, 110 years prior to his last time on earth. But the same day. He slides out of Mrs. Hitler's cooch as she moans in sexual desire of Clinto slivering out. Years later, he commits genocide to a high scale. 6 million jews, he murdered. Clinto was happy. His home planet would be proud. He kept every memory of his alter ego "Adolf", as he was known quite common. He later decides to grow his small mustache into a beard, and goes by the name "Osama". In this, he was so popular. He was the most hated until 2011. That was when Clinto got tired. But he was happy that he managed to create 9/11. He thought that was when he would stop, but no. Clinto was not satisfied. 1888, he decided it would be more interesting to scare people by being unknown, Jack. He had created Jack The Ripper. Altering time, Clinto was so happy that he had put misery on the world. So it was time, it was time for him to become a person. In 1980, he chose that date. And to this very day. He plots down who to kill in what form, every killer that you have heard. It was Clinto. One day, Clinto found a girl he liked online, Amanda. She was the first girl Clinto actually felt feelings for. He talked to her every day, indulged in so many conversations with her, until one day she felt sad. Clinto got upset, so he asked her "what's wrong?". She did not reply, the next day. Amanda uploaded a video on youtube, it got viral. Clinto never saw it, until she died. Clinto was very sad. So Clinto took a bottle of bleach and a noose and screamed to Shrek "Please Shrek! Hear my prayer! Bring back Todd!". Shrek simply said "her time on earth is ogre." Clinto got upset, took the noose and wrapped it around his penis and said "Time to die". And that was the death of Clinto. But we do not cry over the loss of Clinto, for he is in the eye of every child. With us, watching us. He is anonymous he is a legion, he does not forget. He does not forgive. Expect Clinto. A song by Clinto ''[Introduction]'' Yeah... It's my life... My own words I guess... ''[Verse 1]'' Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for? Not the expression, no, literally give an arm for? When they know they're your heart And you know you were their armour And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm her But what happens when karma, turns right around and bites you? And everything you stand for, turns on you to spite you? What happens when you become the main source of her pain? "Daddy look what I made", Dad's gotta go catch a plane "Daddy where's Mommy? I can't find Mommy where is she?" I don't know go play Hailie, baby, your Daddy's busy Daddy's writing a song, this song ain't gonna write itself I'll give you one underdog then you gotta swing by yourself Then turn right around in that song and tell her you love her And put hands on her mother, who's a spitting image of her That's Slim Shady, yeah baby, Slim Shady's crazy Shady made me, but tonight Shady's rocka-by-baby... ''[Chorus]'' And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back... ''[Verse 2]'' I keep having this dream, I'm pushin' Hailie on the swing She keeps screaming, she don't want me to sing "You're making Mommy cry, why? Why is Mommy crying?" Baby, Daddy ain't leaving no more, "Daddy you're lying" "You always say that, you always say this is the last time But you ain't leaving no more, Daddy you're mine" She's piling boxes in front of the door trying to block it "Daddy please, Daddy don't leave, Daddy - no stop it!" Goes in her pocket, pulls out a tiny necklace locket It's got a picture, "This'll keep you safe Daddy, take it withcha'" I look up, it's just me standing in the mirror These fuckin' walls must be talking, cuz man I can hear 'em They're saying "You've got one more chance to do right" - and it's tonight Now go out there and show that you love 'em before it's too late And just as I go to walk out of my bedroom door It turns to a stage, they're gone, and this spotlight is on And I'm singing... ''[Chorus]'' And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back... ''[Verse 3]'' Sixty thousand people, all jumping out their seat The curtain closes, they're throwing roses at my feet I take a bow and thank you all for coming out They're screaming so loud, I take one last look at the crowd I glance down, I don't believe what I'm seeing "Daddy it's me, Help Mommy, her wrists are bleeding" But baby we're in Sweden, how did you get to Sweden? "I followed you Daddy, you told me that you weren't leavin' "You lied to me Dad, and now you make Mommy sad "And I bought you this coin, it says 'Number One Dad' "That's all I wanted, I just want to give you this coin" "I get the point - fine, me and Mommy are gone" But baby wait, "it's too late Dad, you made the choice "Now go up there and show 'em that you love 'em more than us" That's what they want, they want you Marshall They keep.. screamin' your name It's no wonder you can't go to sleep, just take another pill Yeah, I bet you you will. You rap about it, yeah, word, k-keep it real I hear applause, all this time I couldn't see How could it be, that the curtain is closing on me I turn around, find a gun on the ground, cock it Put it to my brain, scream "Die Shady!" and pop it The sky darkens, my life flashes, the plane that I was Supposed to be on crashes and burns to ashes That's when I wake up, alarm clock's ringin', there's birds singin' It's Spring and Hailie's outside swinging, I walk up to Kim and kiss her Tell her I miss her, Hailie just smiles and winks at her little sister Almost as if to say ''[Chorus/Outro]'' And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain Just smile back... 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